I like accidents

Stop making assumptions; I am just expecting some understanding. You are yet to get my rhymes. Anyway, take your time.

I really do expect my life to start receiving friends’ happenings like what Mr Kamal said; I just got one, in which her story is so much like a drama, VERY much like. *top secret*

I realized that, these 2 years, I am not that rational in many situations. Temper, depression, worries, all washing away my sanity, and my power of believing in myself. I once believe myself so much that I can ask for whatever I want, not by mouth, but by heart. But now, before I sleep every night, I will worry much of what will come next. When I reach home, I will worry about my parents’ well being. When I think of what’s next, I will wonder if I can make through another few years and emerge as a better person. What, I am not emo-ing. I am telling.

***
Accidents.
I like accidents. Not car crashing that type. I meants thing happens by chance.
Because I can accidentally sleep on the floor at home. Because I can accidentally run into my old friend. Because I can accidentally do something silly and my mom will laugh. Because I can accidentally get a better result when I am not expecting much. Because I can accidentally kena Toto. Because I can accidentally find and buy something I like. Because I can accidentally get some pocket money from my dad. And because, I actually lose 1kg accidentally. (=________=) slap me.

***
If I were to die tomorrow,
I will not go back to Akasia today. =.=

If I were to die after 3 days,
I will find a lawyer and get my will written; as an 18 year-old, I have a little possession also. Then I will still go back home and be a good daughter (as usual. :P)

If I were to die after one week,
I will ask the lawyer to donate all my possession to people who need it. And I will go back home, and go to some pusat kebajikan to spend my time.

If I were to die after one month,
I will still do whatever I have listed above, and meet a few friends that I’ve known for many years.
I will fly to Switzerland or Italy and stuff myself with chocolate.

If I were to die after a year,
I will do whatever I have listed above, and.. ok I have no more idea. Probably use half of the year to make my parents and siblings healthier and organized. =.=

***
What I thought of today: I prefer straight dealing and I hate crooked story line before something has to be told.

But, in my life, I regretted not being brave enough to tell many truths.

Why am I typing these? I don’t know. =.=